Rebecca Reynolds-January blogpost

Invasive curiosity is a consistent or continual need to know information about others and getting the information is done in a way that can be harmful to the person you are intending to know about. The invasive part in this instance can come in the form of constant questions and often inappropriate, insensitive or even racist questions or remarks. Curiosity is a great quality to have but when it becomes invasive is when it is too much. 

I spend the majority of my day teaching language arts to third and fourth graders.  My students are all multilingual learners so I am always being tuned into what they are saying, whether it’s to me or to their peers. Like many adults today, kids need to learn the right ways to ask questions and they also need to know how to ask questions appropriately.  Many of my students also come from other countries and they have different beliefs than most in the US.  I work with my students daily so that they have a better understanding of how to ask questions, when to ask questions and when not to and also what questions may seem as “inappropriate” ones here in the US. 

Asking questions is how we all learn. Children can be taught how, when and where to do so appropriately each and every day by modeling it for them and by encouraging them to utilize those skills in their interactions with not only their peers but also with adults.  Many of my students are uncomfortable speaking to adults, let alone questioning an adult. Many view this as going against or disagreeing with them and it does not seem as acceptable in their culture. Explaining that there are ways to ask anyone questions and then modeling that for them is one of the best ways to work on expressing appropriate curiosity, instead of them being invasive.

Working with elementary students each day, we spend a lot of time talking about responsibilities, including personal decisions.  At this level, it includes everything from how to treat peers, how to act in the cafeteria, how to behave during assemblies or unstructured times (like the hallways) and down to things like, thinking before asking questions. 

Elementary students are at the age where some want to be like their older brothers and sisters and others want to make their own way without being associated with their siblings.  My students talk about how their decisions that they make each day will continue to shape their life.  Some of this work is done with the whole class, small groups and some done individually. We talk about how the more we make poor decisions, the more our brain becomes used to that process and then you may not have to think long before your body may just act or respond. I use the analogy about sports and that if you want to improve, you have to practice and train to get better.  I then relate that to wanting to improve a child’s reading or to their behavior. Students are reminded that they all have the capacity to make good choices and responsible decisions but that some may need more practice than others. 

I read “The Suitcase” to my fourth grade class. They enjoyed the story but most needed some prompts from me to get them to look deeper into the book instead of just focusing on how “uncool” it was that the characters “broke into” the main characters’ suitcase. One of my students couldn’t believe that the main character would only travel with one suitcase with all of their belongings.  That started a very in-depth conversation for these fourth graders about when their families and them moved to the US. There were a lot of discussions about what each family brought and why. There were some rather “lively” conversations when some students questioned why a family would choose to bring pictures instead of more clothes for the family. The class had a very in-depth and meaningful conversation about the decisions that their family had to make and why. Many students looked deeper into the why’s of their parents’ decisions and most of the time, the answer was that some things could be replaced while others couldn’t.  The one thing that many of the families had in common though was that most of their families didn’t have a lot of time to think intensely about what they wanted to bring because of the unsafe nature of their country and getting short notice that they’d be leaving.